It's Finally Happened!

Yes, that's right folks, the day I've been anxiously awaiting and feared might never come has finally arrived.

This morning I noticed my first grey hair.

I've named it Sybille.

2 States, 2 Days, 3 Diners

Another fun filled weekend has come and gone. This one had the added perk of a surprise (to me at least) visit from Frank's parents so I got to meet his dad. That man is a riot. Now, I spent every lunch period of my 8th grade year making one of my friends snarf iced tea out of her nose at least once so I feel I have some talent in this area, but Frank's dad is a master. At breakfast on Sunday he managed at different moments to get both Megan and Frank to snarf coffee. I bow to his skill.

So Saturday I grabbed a picnic basket and headed into the city where Frank and I enjoyed the lovely weather on his building's roof. I have to admit, 30 stories up is a neat vantage point. After lunch was watching the pilot episode of Twin Peaks and waiting to hear from his Mom about dinner. We ended up in Cherry Hill about 9:30 and waiting on Megan and John's front steps for a few minutes since we beat them home. As Megan put it, we looked like little kids locked out of the house. Hee hee.

Dinner was the Cherry Hill Diner and lots of story telling which always a favorite of mine. I love hearing other peoples tales. Soon it was time for us to go though, there was dancing to be done back in the city. Tentative plans for breakfast were made and we headed out.

The Gaian Mind crew did a phenomenal job of decorating their new monthly venue, the DJs were great and I finally got to hear Mel spin so I was tickled pink. We were happy, silly and sweaty until 2 AM when they turned on the lights and we went home to pass out.

Sunday morning we were back in Cherry Hill, this time for breakfast at the Silver Diner. A little more expensive than the other, but in my opinion better food. This was the site of the snarfing and more laughter. I have to say Frank's family laughs a lot and are really neat people. After lunch we headed back to Philly, we had tickets for the Star Wars exhibit at the Franklin Institute.

The exhibit was really neat and after we caught the IMAX movie on the building of the international space station. I don't know if it was the motion of the movie combined with my stuffiness or Tom Cruise's narration, but I found myself feeling queasy and having to close my eyes now and again. Still, it was pretty interesting.

And since we'd manage to do diners all weekend I couldn't bring myself to break the streak: We went to the Midtown for dinner.

Life is full of laughter these days...I'm quite the lucky girl.

It must be Spring!

It must be spring because I'm cleaning.

I decided to take the evenings off this week, after the gym I've headed home. So far I've replaced a window screen, created one for a back window, repaired a door screen, cleaned out the bathroom closet and gone through and organized every drawer in the living room.

And tonight I'm taking a break from taking a break and heading into the city to see Hedwig and the Angry Inch. According to Amanda it's being done really well, so I'll have a full report for you tomorrow!

Friendship: Part 2

Now the folks that know me, the friends that are my family, know that no matter what time or where I am I'll pick up the phone and do whatever I can, right? Because that's how we are, we are family and we watch out for each other. That said...

This morning at 1 AM my phone rang. It was an acquaintance I met last summer and haven't talked to much in the past few month. The guy who is in the army and had the lemon stick, for those following along. Anyhow, I saw his name on the caller ID and didn't answer. Sounds horrible, I know, but the last time this happened he'd called by accident and I was very sleepy. But he called back so I figured it was important.

I then spent 40 minutes listening to him tell me no one cared about him, he was all alone and no one loved him. My first question to him was, then why did I answer the phone at 1 AM? Well, then it was I was the only one who cared, but that soon was forgotten as he continued to tell me he was all alone. Actually, he's just single-for the first time in a very long time. He's pretty much codependent and doesn't handle this well at all. I tried to say he wasn't really alone, but friends don't count so that didn't go over well.

Eventually it came down to he was tired of trying and didn't want to be around anymore. A typical response to the situation, we've all been there at some point...except he's on base and due to be deployed to Iraq soon. And he's saying he doesn't want to come back. Other things to know: He saw a bunch of his buddies killed during his last tour and blames himself. He's really wanted to go back over there because he wants revenge, he wants to kill as many Iraqis as possible (and he puts everyone from the Middle East into that category). He definitely has PTSD and has supposedly been on a waiting list for counseling.

So knowing all this I asked about the counseling. He isn't going. Because if they knew how he was feeling they wouldn't let him deploy. Oh, and he has a drinking problem though I don't think he was drunk during the conversation. So this is where the argument about therapy happened. My point being that perhaps it was safer for everyone if he got help and didn't deploy. He insists not, and that the therapists don't understand what he's been through. He hasn't even talked with other vets about it, so everything is bottled up inside.

The conversation ended with both of us tired but not angry with each other. And with me very concerned about the men who would be serving with him. This will sound callous and perhaps unlike me, but if he chooses to take his own life I can't stop him. I don't know him well enough to say how people will react, what there is to live for. I feel insincere saying the things I would to someone I'm truly close to. But could I in good conscience let someone I know is self destructive go out and put others in danger?

I am lucky. Ralph is in the service and actually works on the same base base as this guy. I sent him a note this morning about my concerns and our conversation, hoping I wasn't putting him in an awkward position but wondering if there was anyone I should tell. Turns out he's one of the people I could tell, and he's passing the information on to my friend's CO. It will be confidential, but let's face it, who else could it be but me?

Sometimes friendship, or in this case just being a decent human being, is doing something you know isn't going to be popular. Hopefully he'll get help. Hopefully this avoided something truly terrible.

Friendship: Part 1

So Saturday night, as I sat in Megan's living room, my phone buzzed with a text message. It was from Connie. She wrote she had just met the Brigantine NJ police. As I read this aloud John offered to give her some names of cops he knows there. I passed this offer along to Con, and asked if she needed bail. Now let me say that the only reason she would need bail would be in defense of someone else. She isn't the kind of girl who gets hauled off in hand cuffs.

Over the next few days I learned that while she and some friends were down at the shore there was an incident with a guy showing up insisting one of the girls had invited him down. The girl denied this but he wouldn't go away. So the ladies, who had been heading out for the evening, crowded around their friend and went back inside where one called the police (the guy was banging on the front door) and Connie took a frying pan for self defense. While waiting for the police she got her panicked friend to stay away from the windows and basically stood guard. The police were great, laughed about the frying pan, got ride of the guy and basically took care of the girls for the rest of their stay.

Once home Con decided to blog about the incident, focusing on the humor of frying pan-foo. She did this without using names or saying where they were. The friend who was stalked, the one Con stepped in front of to protect, the one she stayed up all night with because she was worried the guy would come back, flipped out on her. Monday morning Con's phone was flooded with texts telling her in not so kind words to take down the blog, that the friend didn't know her anymore and couldn't believe she wrote it. There were 5 before 9 AM when Connie took down the blog. After that this friend kept posting bullitens on My Space about how some people on her friends list were lucky they hadn't been deleted...and on and on.

Connie of course is very hurt and angry. If her friend had called and said please take this down, that would have been one thing. But she didn't. I've blogged about things in the past and have had a friend ask that I change something, which I gladly did. But she asked. She didn't just start with threats of not being my friend or tell me I was a poor friend for mentioning something she didn't like. Oh, and Con's blog is set so only people on her preferred list can see it, so no random strangers.

Right now she's feeling like this friendship that was so important to her for the last 10 years didn't mean anything to the other person. She's the kind of friend who would take a bullet for you, and was ready to do just that this weekend. But from the stories I've heard her "friend" hasn't been much of one in a very long time. Still, it is a shame when it takes something this dramatic to drive home the point.

Luckily Connie does have a good number of people in her life that love her and respect her right back.

Crazy Cool

So Friday Frank and I met Clan Lester at the Franklin Institute to see Lorne Peterson talk about the modeling work he's done with Industrial Light and Magic. It was very interesting, though the fandom of questions at the end was a bit too much for me. Miss Aly looks like she should give birth momentarily, but as she is due in a week or so now that is to be expected. Julia Rose was absolutely adorable. And Mr. Greg was looking tall and full of smiles, styling in a hat made out of a wetnap that Julia gave him.

Frank and I grabbed dinner after the talk then headed to his friend Mel's for a going away party for her roommate John. Much fun, and some very, very interesting conversations involving what certain bushes smell like and someone's amazement that straight people know the smell. Oh, and Jaime brought us the news that surgeons are trying to do surgeries through available orifices now...you know, I really don't want them to take my appendix out through my...I'm okay with the scar. As Frank said, I want them to have all the room they need!

Around three I grudgingly told Frank we should think about heading home. Adam and Andi were hosting the Game and Grill on Saturday and we'd need some sleep beforehand. Saturday started rainy, but ended up as a beautiful day. On our way to their door I dropped a bottle of Mudslide...so I presented Andi with a handful of glass and asked for the recycling bin before saying hello.

Clan Gastonguay was nice enough to bust out the camping grill so Frank could make masala burgers. They turned out yummy, though I realized later I was totally up his butt while he was doing it. Yes, I apologized later. Sometimes I forget he's a perfectly capable human being who isn't prone to doing foolish things...like sticking a fork in a toaster.

Between munching we played Betrayal and a new game Dan created. Both were much fun, and I'm looking forward to playing Dan's game again. Betrayal went the way it did last time I played...I turned out to be the betrayer and was thwarted. Also fun was playing with Jill's nephew Daniel. Another little person who is no longer little! How time flies.

We left around 5 and headed to Cherry Hill, via Ambler, to have dinner with Frank's sisters. Bridget and her husband Allen had flown in from Tennessee and we were getting together with his other sister Megan and her husband John. Dinner at Bucca Di Beppo was quite good and the conversation was hilarious. I have to say I really enjoy his family and am looking forward to meeting Betsy next month.

We were up chatting until 4 or so then crawled home to pass out and enjoy a Sunday of watching movies, sleeping in, snuggling and 6 pounds of lasagna. Whoo hoo!

I decided to take this week off...hee hee

Girl on the Run

First I will say that though the week I came home was hectic, I loved every minute of it and wouldn't have changed a thing! that said...

Monday was a quick trip to the grocery store for provisions then I got to see Clan Reisse. I have to say Charlotte makes me laugh like no other. As Chuck finished dinner she came gleefully running down the hall screaming, "MEEEEAAAATTT!!" Nice little carnivore they have there. Cute too. We all caught up for a bit then I headed home to bed, and of course with the time change I was up until 12 anyway.

Tuesday I went to the gym with Connie and decided to join. So far I am really enjoying it, scary as that sounds! After the gym I headed into the city...only realizing when I was on my way that I'd forgotten how to tell time and would be quite a bit later than I told Frank.

Wednesday was some long over due Lydia time. Zoe got her birthday present...I can't believe how fast she's growing!

Thursday was the gym and a lovely dinner with Monie, followed by a mini grocery run. I needed odds and ends for the weekend festivities and she needed food. Shopping is always more fun with her.

Friday was the lead in to a very fun though packed weekend...

Gone Too Long

Wow...it has been a while. Since last we met I went to visit my Mom and Dad in New Mexico. Everyone has asked if I had fun, enjoyed my vacation...well, it wasn't really a vacation. Think of those trips you make to visit your families and that's pretty much how mine was. There was just a plane ride in there.

I did get to ride "screaming baby express". The last half hour of the trip into Farmington in the little jet was unacceptable to the little person in back of me. She was done traveling and much to her mother's embarrassment cried all the way down. The guy next to me told the pilot upon landing that the little girl didn't like his driving.

Mom and Dad are doing fine. Dad is now the president of his weavers guild. Quite a nice bit of recognition of not only his talent but also his personality. His latest rug is beautiful, and yes, I'm coveting. Hee hee.

Frank was sweet enough to meet me at the airport. Oh was he a sight for sore eyes! I have to say, that was the best welcome home ever! Sunday we hit the Art Museum to see the Kahlo exhibit with some friends. Quite fun. After we curled up to watch some of "Rome" and then I made my way home to the critters, who seem to have missed me. Thank you again to Auntie Jill and Uncle Dan for looking in on them.

And then once Sunday was over the Madness began!

Thought for Mid-April

Challenges

I expected times like this-but never thought they'd be so bad, so long and so frequent.