Bubbles!

Last night was "fun with bubble wrap." I started with the knick knacks. I have less of them than I thought. I must have purged during the last move. Then I went on to start taking down pictures. I'm being good and dusting things as I go. The apartment is starting to look bare. It's a little sad, but then my upstairs neighbor starts stomping around and I cheer up.

The cat is excited because now she has lots of empty bookshelves to sleep on, plus she has discovered she likes playing with bubble wrap. The pig is clueless as usual. And Feldon, well he hasn't really had time to get too comfy so I'm sure he is unfazed. Poor little guy, he just grew back 2 tail feathers then launched himself into a wall the other night and lost one. I don't think he's the brightest bird in the tree, but he's sweet.

It begins...

18 boxes down...and I took a page out of Jill and Dan's book and numbered them. I even have a list of what's in them and where they go in the new place!

Add to those boxes 3 crates of books and a plastic tub of winter clothes and we are doing okay.

I have to admit, the inventory is pretty funny:

videos and sheets
cds and blankets

Just trying to keep things as light as possible...whee!

Dinner and a Show

Saturday I got to do one of my favorite things: Feed friends. Don, Connie, Will, Andrew and Monie came over for dinner followed by watching Pan's Labyrinth, such a great movie.

Don arrived first and we caught up on the sad defeat of Penn's women's lacrosse team on Friday. Will and Connie arrived shortly there after, followed by Andrew. We started on salad and by the time we were ready for dinner Monie had joined us.

The conversation was good, even a touching a bit on ethics and the difference between the varying philosophies and those accepted for government. Somehow Andrew ended up making his observation about the effects of sending our "best and brightest" into battle, so I countered with my usual comment that it has historically only been the males, explaining why women seem to be gathering speed in the IQ department. Unfortunately this sparked the defensive "you think I am dumb enough to argue that?" come back. One of these days he'll understand that having a discussion or debate is different than having a"yo momma" contest. Ah the young.

But it was a fun night, and I'll count it a success as a loaf of Italian bread, 2 bags of salad, most of a pan of ziti and around 40 cookies were consumed...happiness.

Crating the Puppies to go Bowling

A busy but very nice Friday.

The day started with meeting Julie's coworker Wendy who was taking my dog crate. One less thing to move or trash! Once that was squared away I called Miss Connie to arrange adventures in bra shopping!

We decided to take my car since there was guaranteed AC and proceeded to Hatboro to visit the bank and our first stop: The Lacy Lady. At some point we passed Andrew. I know this because Connie shouted "Andrew!" Parking was nuts, so I circled the block while Con did her banking. Sadly Lacy Lady seemed to be closed, so we forged on to Mi-Lady Corset Shop in Jenkintown. I should mention we were looking for a strapless bra for a wedding Connie is going to be in.

The ladies at the shop were great, but refused to sell Con a bra until they tried it with the dress. They didn't want her to buy something that might not work, then not be able to return it. So our outing was much shorter than expected, meaning we decided to get lunch. The Drafting Room was great as always.

I got home and passed out a for a little after doing some cleaning and wrestling Christmas into my trunk. Monie arrived around 7 and we headed toward Norristown to celebrate Dan's birthday with bowling.

Monie, Chuck and I shared a lane and I once again proved that though I enjoy it, I really have no bowling skills. I did however know the area, so that came in handy when Mapquest left some party goers lost. I helped!

And of course we ended up trying to distract other lanes, mostly Chuck and Adam. Chuck started it with a taunt of "nice penis" as Adam was about to throw. Later Adam came back with "nice labia," successfully distracting the normally unflappable Chuck. Not to be outdone, Chuck then donned the White Trash Bikini (take the front hem of your shirt and tuck it through your collar creating an interesting look). I missed this entirely. What I did witness was Monie turning a slight shade of green and Adam looking like he was going to scratch out his eyes.

In a spectacular display of human unity, Monie and Adam decided to try synchronized bowling to purge the image out of their minds. It was a beautiful thing, with both balls hitting the pins at the same time and completing both spares.

Ya gotta love it.

Woman Has To Get 6 Stitches After Hit With Sex Toy

From January 2006...


AKRON, Ohio -- A sex toy landed a local man in court Tuesday.
A Summit County jury convicted Excell Bradley, of Barberton, of domestic violence for throwing what the prosecutor called a large sex toy into the eye of a woman with whom he lived, NewsChannel5 reported.
Police said Bradley's across-the-room toss of the sex toy caused enough damage to require six stitches to the woman's eye.
While bleeding and with blurry vision, she called 911, WEWS reported.
Bradley admitted to Barberton police that he threw the toy.

Now that is just silly.

Rumblings

When I was little every now and again things would very still and quiet…then the ground would calmly tremble under my feet. Just a little earthquake, something as common to me as thunderstorms are to folks who grow up on the East Coast.

Today I got into work a little early and was enjoying puttering around in the quiet: Just me, my puppets and Tony working in the back shop. Will came in shortly after 7, still a little puffy from having his wisdom teeth out and obviously still hurting. Then Connie came in, and I recognized the calm before the ground starts shaking.

So I practiced my “Rock in the River,” listened, made jokes (because that’s what I do) and kept my head down. I suppose I’m lucky to be coming from a job where one boss made people cry and the other made me want to scatter birdseed in the back seat of his convertible. It helps keep things in perspective. Life has much less stress for me now, but that is largely because I am very used to “do and undo then redo” and both Will and Connie want to do it perfectly the first time. Sadly life just isn’t that way, especially when you are trying to bring someone else’s vision to life.

And there are 3 ways to do things wherever you work: The right way, the wrong way and the way your boss thinks it's going to be done. Guess which one you should choose? And really, what does doing it her way hurt? How does it negatively impact you? Sure it may not be the way you'd go about doing it, but is it really that bad? Besides, 9 times out of 10 there is a reason for it...

It’s good to be a rock…the water just flows around you.

Bad Ideas

Burger King has wireless internet access.

I know, you're thinking this isn't news. The Burger King in Montgomeryville has put in workstations. My first thought was, "Hm...computer equipement near children, salt and ketsup, not sounding like this was thought through."

Then a gentleman walked in with his laptop. Still in it's original box. And he couldn't get on to the internet. And somehow he expected the guy who took 2 tries to get Monie's order right to provide crack tech support.

Yeah...this could get ugly.

Weekend Wrap Up

Well, it was a rather quiet weekend...after a very busy Friday.

I was up early to meet Jill on Friday so I could get a peek at the new house. It is lovely! Unfortunately we got stuck in mystery traffic on the way. Luckily Chuck was available to be our little spy and after some internet magic let us know that we were behind half a house...we didn't move for 25 minutes! Once at the house there was a made dash to measure and photograph. All in all it was pretty fun, and the drive is beautiful so I'm looking forward to visiting.

Once Jill dropped me back at my car I headed to Norristown to meet Connie, Bill, Don and Amanda for lunch at Minados. While waiting for the girls I regaled the boys with the story of being mistaken for Connie's mom. This came back to haunt me of course, but the story was too funny to keep to myself.

After lunch I headed to coffee with Lydia. I was early so I curled up on the coffee couch and read for a bit. Not a bad way to spend an afternoon. Lydia arrived and we caught up for a bit. I was back home by 5, made a quick dinner and relaxed for a few minutes before I was out the door and headed to Chez Reisse.

Miss Charlotte is now sporting a whole bunch of teeth and walking at a near professional level. Mom and Dad seem to be keeping up for now, and treated me to the dinner show as they did a modified square dance while Charlotte sat in her high chair. That child is going to have the most funfilled life, I swear.

Saturday was much slower. I had my hair cut (nothing major) then went out to see Shrek the 3rd with Monie. Fun movie, and it looks like I'll be seeing it again this week with another crew. Sunday was a very lazy day. I thought about packing, even did a little. There was also an outing to Wallmart for a tub, and U-Haul for some boxes. And even thought it was a slow day I still fell asleep on the couch at 7 PM.

I am such a sleepy head!

Shrinking

There was a whole lot of screaming going on in my apartment Thursday night. Connie was over and we were looking through old pictures. As we were flipping through 1998 we came across shots of then roommate Frank's friend Pat. Pat looked familiar. Connie's older sister was friends with him (read: had a huge crush). I then yelped, "Your sister is THAT Renee?!"

Creepier still, Connie also knows Frank...he rented a room in her mother's house when Connie was in high school.

This world is much too small...and now I know more about Connie's sister than I'd really like to.

Thump

If you heard a thumping last night between thunder claps that was me hitting my head on a table.

Connie called on her way home from work to ask if I had had dinner and if not if I'd like to meet her at the diner. Knowing she didn't want to go home at that point I said sure and headed out. Once seated our waiter (a nice Greek gentleman, but not the one with the extra thumb) seemed to be pausing a little longer than normal to look and us then asked if there was something between us.

Okay, I admit my first thought was, "No we aren't dating" but then turned to the "Do Connie and I really look like sisters?" thought. Ha ha ha.

At our confusion he elaborated and asked if she was my DAUGHTER! Yes, it's a bit better than when Jill is mistaken for my daughter, but I would have been 8 when I had Connie! Do I really look this old? At the strangled sob/laugh that came out of me he explained that he thought Connie was 16, which made me feel a little better, and figured me at around 29 so I'm guessing he's seen a lot of young mothers. Let me have my delusion!

That poor man looked like he wanted to crawl under a rock and die. He didn't seem to believe we weren't somehow related, quizzed us about work, apologized again and hurried away. After dinner he came by to say he was going into the kitchen to do some work, but would be on until 8 and we shouldn't feel rushed, I could sit and read my book if I wanted, then grabbed my shoulder as he walked away.

We laughed about it, but now I'm reconsidering my general dislike of wearing make up...perhaps I should be a little more faithful with my anti-aging regime...

Gump

"Momma always said life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get."

I do! Butter cream...at least when I date, I get butter cream 9 times out of 10. Why? Because I don't like butter cream. It's not horrible or anything, it just doesn't light up my world like say...a caramel chocolate. It's just okay, sort of the bean curd of candies.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not a chocolate snob. I'm actually pretty open minded. I like caramels, mousse filled, jelly, solid, most nuts and even chocolate covered cherries. Butter cream just leaves me flat. Lately I've run across way too much butter cream. I've tried to grow to like it, but it doesn't seem to work. In a pinch I've eaten just the chocolate shell and thrown away anything of real substance...but it just isn't satisfying. And on the rare occasion that I've come across one of my favorites it seems some one's already taken a bite out of them (that's just messy) or they've been in the warm too long and need time in the fridge to set up again. Leaving me with a plethora of butter cream. I think there may be a turtle around, but it's looking out of reach.

Sigh.

Good thing I'm on a diet...

Wednesday?

Well, I managed to escape Tuesday with little contact with the Tuesday Monster. Unfortunately it sounds like he is visiting Monie, so hopefully he has packed it in for another week for her as well.

Last night was dinner with Andrew and seeing Hot Fuzz again. Both very enjoyable. Our waiter was fun, very attentive...at some points I almost wondered if he were hosting a party. He popped by frequently to ask if we needed anything, and when we said we were fine each time he said "Great, I'll be right back." I was half expecting it when he took the check, but he managed to keep it inside. I'm guessing he'd just finished training and the last beating to cement the skill of being attentive to your customers was still fresh.

A short walk through the lot to the theater had us in our seats with time to make fun of the pre-preview commercials and then on to the movie. If you haven't seen Hot Fuzz, see it. I'm up for another round!

Hm...

Jerry Falwell died.

May he find more love at judgement than he displayed to humanity in life.

Quote of the Day

"I'm 30... of course I'm damaged goods. But I'm goods none the less!"~From Adam and Steve.

Change it to 32 and I'm loving this quote. The movie was fantastic as well. It follows the ups and downs of a gay couple and a heterosexual couple and even has a country line dancing off! How can you not love it?

You can tell I've been watching a lot of the LOGO channel lately, can't you?

WOW!

And I don't mean World of Warcraft! I dragged my sorry, sneezey self to the store for allergy meds last night and came face to face with $379 cheese. It was a large block of Parmesan.

I mean, I love cheese, but who's going to go to Giant and buy that much Parmesan?

Sunday! Sunday! Sunday!

Sunday was roaming New Hope with Connie since my sneezing fits made me reconcider seeing Clan Reisse. It was a beautiful day for it, and we spent the afternoon roaming from shop to shop.

We both ended up with interesting jewelry and fun clothes from the Tibeten shop. Monie's birthday present was purchased and that turned out to be rather entertaining. And I found a very nice pair of silver earrings at Orb, along with a great story.

As I browsed from case to case in Orb while Connie was having a reading done at Mystikal Tymes a little boy, probably about 3, wandered in covered in the water ice he was eating. His mother told him he could sit in the chair while she shopped...in other stores! The owner told him not only could he not sit there, he couldn't even be in the store with her while he was eating. After they left this sparked a "kids/parents today conversation." Once I finally made a decision about what I wanted he made a suggestion of a similar design that was actually hand made by the founder of the store, and he was right, it was much more interesting. (I can't get into details because this is another gift)

He went on to tell me that he had a man come down from NYC to request a ring be made of it in gold. He had been looking for this ring for years...his acting teacher had one but since he inherited it he didn't know where it came from. His teacher was Eli Wallach. Mr. Wallach had inherited the ring from Tennessee Williams, who had gotten it as a gift. The best all involved could figure out was that when the creator was just starting to do his own work he had made this ring in gold and it was sold at a little shop in Soho.

Just a very neat story, and a lovely day.

Self Discovery

I enjoy horror movies.
I watch surgical programs because I find the operations interesting.

I am having trouble getting through "Latter Days," a movie about a young Mormon guy dealing with being homosexual and a family who blames his sexuality for everything that is wrong in their lives. The gist is that he ends up meeting a young gay waiter and this waiter and his female roommate have a bet as to whether he can seduce the Mormon guy. Of course along the way the waiter gets attached...and the Mormon guy leaves after sleeping with him.

I started watching last night, but had to switch channels after watching the boy's mother say he could be forgiven for the things he does, but no one could forgive him for being what he was...oh, and it was his fault his father was never home.

It was on again this morning, but I didn't make it again. I made it through the guy's suicide, but then watching his partner find out about his death when he once again called to try to talk to him and his mother screamed he was responsible for her son's death...it was harsh. You just watch this poor man spiral into depression, until one of the AIDS patients he delivers meals to tells him he should stop coming to see him because he was depressing him...then he decides to try to make peace and there is more interaction with Mom. I just could take it.

So it seems I am fine with blood, gore and boogy men, but I can't handle human cruelty. One of these days I'll make it through the movie...it really is quite good.

Over the River and Through the Woods

Okay, no Grandma's house, but still a fun day. I headed over to Graeme Park at 10 AM to muck around and take pictures.

Connie was up for the adventure, as were her friends Meghan and Jarad, and Andrew even joined us inspite of sleep deprivation.

Our intrepid band of explorers

There was much clicking of shudders and some comedy as well...

Andrew finds a low rent apartment while Jarad explores a career in tree gynocology

Just a pretty flower

So after a morning of adventure we headed to Ruby Tuesday's for lunch, where Meghan pitched balls of paper into Connie's cleavage and we did a tick count:

Connie: 3

Andrew: 1

Meghan: 1

Jarad: 0

Me: 0

And happily no one got bitten. Then the tired little campers went their seperate ways.

And then when I got home...just for fun...

In the Future...

Sandwiches will be replicated without crusts...who knew?

Curiosity

So my "bear went over the mountain" curiosity has got me doing some biblical research, sparked by a religious debate a few weeks ago. With the help of a friend I've been learning about the practices of Jehova's witnesses. Aside from being more aggressive evangelists they seem to be of the standard christian mould. I've started to wonder if some people don't confuse them with Hari Chrishnas.

That said, I was reading the Watch Tower online and was fascinated by a reprinted article that was published in the AMA journal. I did not realize Witnesses refuse blood transfusions. It is rather interesting, and with modern medical practices not quite as tricky as it first sounded to me.

I was of course a bit tickled to read the role of wife and husband (turns out God approves of my divorce since adultery was involved). And happy to read that the wife's job was not to stay home and bake pie. And this lead me to the page on their beliefs, which begins with things "God thinks are bad." Pretty standard stuff, and since it mentioned homosexuality (along with bestiality, incest, premarital sex and adultery) and gave biblical citations I decided to blow the dust off my King James and take a peak. Specifically cited was Leviticus 18:6, and that particular verse references not having sex with "kin". Leviticus 18:22 specifically mentions that laying with mankind as you would womankind is a no no.

What I found much more interesting was the preceding and continuing verses against incest. Aside from verse 22 the rest of the chapter, continuing to Chapter 21 is all about not sleeping with relatives. Oh, and one about not having spite sex with your wife's sister. It seems to me that there was a bigger problem than homosexuality in ancient times. I'm all about context, if you hadn't guessed. Moses went to great pains to leave no wiggle room in the can I/can't I debate. Not your mom, not your father's wife who isn't your mom, not your aunt or uncle, not your sister or brother, even if they aren't blood related...and so on.

Also of interest were the punishments for various offenses, most were death, but not all. You get :
Burned if you sleep with your wife and her mother,
Shunned if you sleep with your sister (very specific this one, "his sister, his father's daughter or mothers daughter")
Shunned when sex happens during menstruation (how would people know?)
Childless if you have sex with your uncle's wife or your brother's wife

And apparently there was a time when people had been convinced not to sacrifice their children to false gods, so to keep said gods (or demons) somewhat appeased men would masturbate into the sacrificial fire. This too was a no no, and I imagine a wee bit dangerous. Nothing like hedging your bets I suppose, but considering how difficult some men find it to maintain an erection when drunk I have to wonder how these guys managed to do it over an open flame.

And that is my current musing...I'll keep you posted.

Looking Back

For lack of anything better to do I found myself reading over old posts tonight and I realized something really wonderful had happened: I answered my own paranoid questions.

Last summer I had a cancer scare and I posted my fears, however irrational (see Cartwheels). Among my worries was how would I take care of me? It never entered my mind that I would lean on my friends. Not that they wouldn't be there for me, but I just didn't want to put that on them. Now I know, they won't give me a chance to say no. And again I am amazed my the people around me...

...And promise I have no intentions of availing myself of their help in that way any time soon!

Tis the Season

I played my first game of mini golf this spring last night. I played horribly as always, but had such fun! It was decided for us that no score would be kept...the inside of the card was blank. This being the case no one had to putt one-handed.

So the golfing was completely spur of the moment. I had a lovely dinner with Julia and on the way home it was just so nice out, and still relatively early so I cajoled Andrew into meeting me at Garden Golf. Good fun, good company, and I've yet to find a bug bite.

Quote of the Month...

"Life doesn't use vaseline...it just bends you over...and it is painful"

--Monique

How Could I Forget!

Somehow I managed to forget something quite extraordinary from Saturday. At the bar, Chuck informed me, was none other than Eric Schmuckler!

Now, I have been hearing about Eric Schmuckler from both Chuck and his friend Andy for about 10 years. Here is what I know about Eric Schmuckler:

1. He's a lawyer
2. He orders Moons Over My-Hammy when at I-HOP
3. He has an amazingly fun last name

How could I not demand to meet Eric Schmuckler?! So after much pouting and a little whimpering (and Bill begging Chuck to just get him because he couldn't take the puppy dog eyes any longer) Eric Schmuckler was presented to the table.

You know, he looks like an Eric Schmuckler.

5th of May: Post Mortem

No, no one died! And to my knowledge, no one even threw up...though Chuck's health is still in question, but that is a story better left unwritten at this time.

By 7:00 we had lost George and Andrew would be joining us after dinner. Connie got to my place and we zipped over to Jill and Dan's. Though we sighted Bill's truck we didn't see him, and after talking to Jill and Dan realized he must have parked and walked over the Shanachie. We soon did the same. On the way Monie called to say she was running late, but would be there, no worries! Upon arrival we found Adam, Bill and Chuck waiting at the bar. While Bill kept thinking he knew Adam apparently neither boy spoke up so that was a bit of fun before our table was ready.

Once seated there was a call of the initial tequila shot by Chuck. Connie was game (her first tequila experience), I was in, there was Chuck of course. Much to my surprise and delight Bill broke his 10 year "No tequila" rule and joined us, and we just ordered one for Adam and made him drink it. All good. Our waitress was great fun, and for our part we generated an amazing bar tab but were not unduly rowdy so she was pretty tickled with us.

Monie arrived just after we ordered dinner, so put in her order and another round of tequila was ordered, with her taking Adam's place. Dinner was good, the conversation was better and Adam graced us with the occasional magic trick...and I think he, Dan and Jill were playing cards at one point. Once again I must thank Jill and Dan for coming out and risking social embarrassment...as I told the waitress when she remarked how well we behaved considering the amount of alcohol consumed, we police our own and part of that is because I don't want my former roomie whispered about in the hallways of her school!

Andrew joined us later in the evening, and though he wasn't up to tequila I did manage to get him to eat a strawberry. I'd ordered a cheese board as an appetizer and there were still a few pieces of fruit on it that I decided needed to be eaten. Just about all were graped and but Bill was stubborn about his non-love of grapes so he was appled.

There was my normal substitution of Monie for salt on one shot, and Andrew for salt on another. After showing us his new belt buckle I had to comment that it looked like the little boxes they used to sell in the CUB with a secret compartment ("You can put your weed in there!"). This was followed by his showing off his button fly, at which point I felt it necessary to let him know that was not such a good idea when I was drinking tequila. Okay, I admit it, I said it just to see that look on his face. But as we know, women are evil. And why are women evil? Because boys are easy to stun!

Later in the evening there was Monie, Connie and I putting a dollar down Bill's pants...or trying to. Bill and I resting our heads on Connie's chest while we talked...mostly to make her laugh. Telling Chuck that his telling the waitress "If I wasn't married..." was indeed creepy. And I did manage a dance with Andrew without wiping us both out...thank God I convinced him not to dip. It's a minor miracle he didn't lose me on the spin!

So after dinner and drinking about $200 worth of tequila it was time to head home. Except for Monie, she had another function to attend. I don't know how she finds the energy. There was a little drama with Chuck, but then goodbyes were said and we wandered off to our respective cars. And yes, we were okay to drive. All got home safely and Connie and I had lunch the next day. She seemed to suffer no ill effects from her first Tequila Night, and that is how it should be. Sadly we never saw Jen, so I'll have to track her down and tease her.

All in all, a successful, fun evening with lovely people.

5th of May: Prelude

Again, there was happy sleeping in on Saturday. Once I got my carcass up and moving I called over to Greg and Aly's to see if it would be a good time to pop over with presents for the birthday boy and girl. It was, and I did!

Julia Rose showed me how she makes her belly button talk...oh so cute! Greg and Aly and I caught up a bit on mutual friends and life in general. Greg has been my sanity check on moving back into the old apartment (hm...isn't there a song about that?) and Aly backed him up that it was a good idea. It will be nice to be in Ambler again, close to the places I like to go! And even a little closer to work!

Soon the afternoon was wearing on and I had to get home and get ready for the Cinco de Mayo festivities. Sadly Clan Lester wouldn't be joining us, but that just means we'll all have to get together on a non-tequila themed evening in the near future!

4th of May!

Well the first Friday off of the season was a beautiful one. I slept late (which turned out to be a weekend theme) then puttered around the apartment in a daze for a while. Jill called when she got home from work, and after a short talk with Lydia I was out the door to catch up with Jill.

Jill and Dan have bought a cute little house in Boyertown...a little farther away than I'd like, but seeing as I love them and like driving out that way I don't see it being a real problem. And since they will be moving out of my old apartment...yep, I'm moving back in! Very happy things all around. I even spoke with my old landlord and she was happy to have me back. It sort of feels like a reset on life, but in a very positive way.

Knots

So I had managed to tie some parts of my life into rather stubborn knots...and now I am untying them. Normally I love untying knots, there's just something about it that gives me a real sense of accomplishment. While I still feel I've accomplished something, I don't enjoy emotional knots.

The latest I've managed to unravel would be the boy. A case of another sweet person...just not the right person. We'd reverted to something more casual a few weeks ago, and of course my life sped up...and I realized even dating just wasn't a priority for me. So last night we had the "It's not you, it's me" conversation. Which was for once completely true. Sure there were little things that bothered me, but nothing that couldn't have been worked on had the feeling been there.

So that is one knot down...and we may salvage a friendship. Time will tell. On to the next puzzle.

Aging

So after last week's being taunted by my hematologist about turning 33 this summer I'm still not feeling old. I may not be young, but 33 is not old. That said, it would seem the men in my life are feeling elderly these days.

John will be 38 this year. He's already fussing over diminished stamina and saying things like "I'm not a young man anymore". Apparently he was young and spry when I met him at 36, so what happened? I won't mention the dramatics over his discovery that his hairline had receded more than he thought.

Don is 40. I'd asked him if he'd like to play tennis one of these weekends. For the record "tennis" is defined as trying to get the ball over the net and return a serve. I'm not a good player, but it is fun. We went from him being rusty and out of shape to a declaration that he may have become a doubles player due to his "decreased mobility". Um...as far as I know he isn't using a walker...and hey! I'm the one with the limp!

Maybe it's a guy thing...

Normal?

Okay...things seem to be getting back to normal...knock wood. And I even managed to figure out our network thing...should have known it was a Norton issue...

This Saturday is the annual Cinco de Mayo festivities, once again to be held at the Irish pub in Ambler. It looks like a good turn out again this year, with folks from different corners of my life which is always nice. We've got Connie and her friends George and Andrew-that's right, I finally get to meet the much talked about George! Then Jen from work will also be joining us after dinner, we've finally got her to make an appearance! Sadly Miss Amanda won't be coming, but we'll get her out another time. We also snagged Adam for the fun, though Andi is out of town. Adding to the list are the usual rabble rousers: Jill, Dan, Chuck, Bill and of course, me. The jury is still out on Monie, but I've got my fingers crossed. She is, after all, my usual Cinco de Mayo shot buddy.

So we have work, college, gamer and extended friends coming. Not too shabby. And if anyone is wondering, I've decided I get one shot and a beer. Though I've been cleared to drink heavily as long as I promise not to fall down, I don't think I'm up for it this year.

Partido!

V is for Victory

Okay, partial victory.

I came in this morning fairly sure I knew what was wrong with our internet. After 45 minutes on the phone with the lovely Patricia from Verizon we reset the modem, got on the internet and made Ardia's wireless device admit that the connection existed.

As for the network...Ardia's computer can see mine, but that's the extent of it. So I've given up and asked Steve to come in tomorrow and fix it, since he created it in the first place.

Cross your fingers!

Stealth Piggy Banks

So my car was in the shop Monday and today. Monday they replaced the transmission pressure regulator...thingy. The other issue I was having was with the stereo. It would periodically cut out, both when playing a CD and tuning in stations. I could thump the dash and it would come back for a time, but would pop out again sooner or later. This created a dangerous, if comical driving environment. I thought it might be a speaker issue since the CD was still reading even when I couldn't hear it.

The guys checked out my system, could hear what I was talking about, but couldn't figure out why it was happening. Since it was under warranty they asked to keep the car another day and replace the whole unit.

So this afternoon Ron my mechanic calls and asks if I have children. I say no, thinking that between my passengers and me they could have found anything from playland balls to puzzle pieces in my back seat. Well, it turns out that when they took my radio out they found around $2.30 in loose change.

His best guess was that the previous owner (or more likely their child) had taken to putting change in the CD holder below the stereo face, not realizing it could fall into the dash. So things would be fine until a coin hit a wire, then the wire would short and the speaker would go out. Then I'd thump the dash and dislodge the coin.

I think I'll stick to putting my change in my piggy bank...

And then...

Bob trashed the internet connection with one press of the modem reset button.

Sigh.

Ardia and I spent about 2 hours on the phone with Verizon tech support, sadly it wasn't a particularly good one and she kept insiting Ardia was my mom, and I needed to get her on the phone.

Smooth.

Still no internet or network. Tomorrow's another day.

Hell...

There are no flames in Hell,
No Lake of Fire
There are no devils with pitchforks poking at the flesh of the damned
In fact, you aren't even aware of the other corrupt souls at all

For Hell, you see, is technology.
Computer networking to be more precise.

To recap:
4/25-My work computer's memory fries
4/26-Yes, the memory is truly dead
4/27-New memory installed, computer up and running except it doesn't see our network
4/30 9:00 AM-All my desktop icons disappear and I still can't see the network
4/30 10:30AM-Office Internet disappears, I restore my computer to an earlier point and my desktop icons reappear.
4/30 11:00AM-12:30 PM-Verizon tech support finally determines our modem died
4/30 1:30 PM-3:00 PM-Dell tech support kindly tries to get my computer to see our network. After and hour and a half I tell him to go on with his life, I'll muddle through since nothing we were trying seemed to work.
4/30 3:40 PM-I uninstall Norton Antivirus...Ta-Da! I'm on the network!
5/1 7:00 AM-I disconnect the defunct modem and connect the new one
5/1 7:05 AM-Nothing happens
5/1 7:30 AM-Back on the phone with Verizon tech support
5/1 8:30 AM-Internet! Now I just have to connect everyone else...
5/1 8:45 AM-Everyone but Ardia is up and running...Ardia has a wireless hook up that is being stubborn
5/1 9:00 AM-Now no one can see the *&^%$ network...I DON'T WANT TO BE TECH SUPPORT ANY MORE!!!!!!
5/1 10:08 AM-Bob from downstairs comes up to save me (they do office networking)
5/1 10/:38 AM-Bob leaves in frustration but will return after lunch. We need to reset that computer's gateway (?) and if that doesn't work I'm just running a really long cable...

I want a pencil...

Oh, if you're wondering, no I didn't set up our office network. I've never set one up, though I think I know how to now. Who did, you ask? Steve...