GO TO THE POLICE
Another rant, I'm full of them today! I spent a lot of time yelling at my radio recently.
NPR has been doing a series on campus safety, specifically the instance of rape on campus. The stories are sad, frustrating and scary for the most part. Women who are asleep in there rooms and someone comes in and violates them. Women who are drunk at parties and unable to fight off attackers but clearly saying no. One interview broke my heart. The girl had been really drunk at a party and two male friends were nice enough to walk her home, then took turns raping her. She couldn't believe it happened, tried to convince herself it was a misunderstanding and the year went by. It wasn't until a professor was discussing the use of rape to torture women in war torn countries, and took a moment to talk about date rape and say there were people on campus who wanted to know and would help, that this girl finally admitted she was raped. She went to the dean and they confronted the guys, but so much time had passed that it became he said/she said and nothing happened. The girl went on to file for a Title 9 hearing (equality on campus) but that fell flat.
Another story was a girl who came home from a party, crashed on her bed and was raped by someone in her dorm. She told the college, they had a hearing in which the guy and his father called her a slut who was just regretting a one night stand. The guy cried and admitted he had a drinking problem, the school thought this was a "teachable moment" and suspended him for a semester, later expanded to a year. The girl went to the board of education and sued for a Title 9 hearing, they went over the evidence and decided the school acted correctly.
Rape is wrong. I don't care who was drunk, how much time has passed or what the situation is. Once one party says no or falls unconscious it's no longer concentual. Period. If you are that worked up, man or woman, go into the bathroom and take care of your own needs. People don't report rapes because they are embarrassed, they think they lead someone on, they know how hard the process is and they worry about what others will think or say. And those are just a few of the obsticals to people reporting a rape.
But what I want to know is why weren't the police involved? Why weren't charges brought against these men?
In the first case I can sort of understand it. The rape was reported after almost a year. The woman herself had been trying to convince herself it didn't happen. The men were friends. There is a lot to work through there before a person is strong enough to be public about it. In her retelling she was hesitant, crying, embarrassed and just seemed so fragil. I don't know if the police would have been able to make charges stick, not that it makes it okay. And to me it seemed that her parents pushed the issue to the board of education, again I'm not sure if court would have done more damage to her.
But the second woman was screaming from the hill tops that she'd been raped and by whom. She was angry and wanted justice. She wanted the man to expelled from school so she wouldn't have to live on campus knowing she could run into him. She reported the incident to the school when it happened. Why weren't the police involved? Why didn't the school bring them in? And if they didn't bring in the police, why didn't she report it herself? I realize how hard it is to come forward, but she's been so vocal I don't understand why she wouldn't want this creep in jail.
As always, I just have part of the story. I just got mad because the second woman was so indignant that nothing was being done, but never once mentioned filing charges. I understand her anger, but I think if you are willing to go this public, willing to sue the university, you should be willing to file charges so the same thing doesn't happen to someone else. And to take back some of that power someone stole in the dark.
NPR has been doing a series on campus safety, specifically the instance of rape on campus. The stories are sad, frustrating and scary for the most part. Women who are asleep in there rooms and someone comes in and violates them. Women who are drunk at parties and unable to fight off attackers but clearly saying no. One interview broke my heart. The girl had been really drunk at a party and two male friends were nice enough to walk her home, then took turns raping her. She couldn't believe it happened, tried to convince herself it was a misunderstanding and the year went by. It wasn't until a professor was discussing the use of rape to torture women in war torn countries, and took a moment to talk about date rape and say there were people on campus who wanted to know and would help, that this girl finally admitted she was raped. She went to the dean and they confronted the guys, but so much time had passed that it became he said/she said and nothing happened. The girl went on to file for a Title 9 hearing (equality on campus) but that fell flat.
Another story was a girl who came home from a party, crashed on her bed and was raped by someone in her dorm. She told the college, they had a hearing in which the guy and his father called her a slut who was just regretting a one night stand. The guy cried and admitted he had a drinking problem, the school thought this was a "teachable moment" and suspended him for a semester, later expanded to a year. The girl went to the board of education and sued for a Title 9 hearing, they went over the evidence and decided the school acted correctly.
Rape is wrong. I don't care who was drunk, how much time has passed or what the situation is. Once one party says no or falls unconscious it's no longer concentual. Period. If you are that worked up, man or woman, go into the bathroom and take care of your own needs. People don't report rapes because they are embarrassed, they think they lead someone on, they know how hard the process is and they worry about what others will think or say. And those are just a few of the obsticals to people reporting a rape.
But what I want to know is why weren't the police involved? Why weren't charges brought against these men?
In the first case I can sort of understand it. The rape was reported after almost a year. The woman herself had been trying to convince herself it didn't happen. The men were friends. There is a lot to work through there before a person is strong enough to be public about it. In her retelling she was hesitant, crying, embarrassed and just seemed so fragil. I don't know if the police would have been able to make charges stick, not that it makes it okay. And to me it seemed that her parents pushed the issue to the board of education, again I'm not sure if court would have done more damage to her.
But the second woman was screaming from the hill tops that she'd been raped and by whom. She was angry and wanted justice. She wanted the man to expelled from school so she wouldn't have to live on campus knowing she could run into him. She reported the incident to the school when it happened. Why weren't the police involved? Why didn't the school bring them in? And if they didn't bring in the police, why didn't she report it herself? I realize how hard it is to come forward, but she's been so vocal I don't understand why she wouldn't want this creep in jail.
As always, I just have part of the story. I just got mad because the second woman was so indignant that nothing was being done, but never once mentioned filing charges. I understand her anger, but I think if you are willing to go this public, willing to sue the university, you should be willing to file charges so the same thing doesn't happen to someone else. And to take back some of that power someone stole in the dark.
Labels: Rant
posted by Liz @ 11:56 AM
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